fireworks !

you are just like a fireworks

beautiful

grand

yet

very short

very very short

and it just end with nothing left

you are just like a fireworks - beautiful with sparks and colorful

my life just lighten up by the fireworks

tho is short i still appreciate it :)

shit !!!

worried

hope is not the worst as i imagined

hope is not too late for me when i decided to stand up

don't want it to go worst anymore

i had enough ady

need to wait a week

only can get to know the result

i'm so in depress and tension

WTF !!!

awake

finally awake d

贯彻

透彻

醒了

痛

Air Supply - Making Love Out Of Nothing At All (HQ Audio)(SOLID GOLD)

动了

不该动得情

该如何停止

飞蛾扑火，自焚身

thinking of you

i think

i've mess up the feeling

between two person

and it reminds me of

adele song - someone like you

so i think of you because personally you yourself

or is just because - someone like you

well the short weekend

spending with you

is really a charming weekend for me

just like a

fairy tale

never thought of i can experience that

once in my life

is cool

yet

is so fragile like a bubble

oh my oh my

short vacation

how good if it never ends

i rather admitted to hospital rather than stay at home !

食言

don't trust my words

don't trust my promises

at this moment

cause even myself

could not be trust anymore

be patient to me please

i'll use action to prove it

don't ask me when

i only can say

快了

慢慢的体验到了

为何

有些人宁愿选择

如此的一个生活

如此的一个决定

sorry

对不起

对自己说

让自己

一次又一次的

放纵

放肆

食言

对不起

对爱我的朋友

一次又一次

让你们

失望

唉！

我的定力

我的念力

我的坚持

我的原则

我的自律

去了哪里啦 ？

再这样下去

我的人生

就是一踏糊涂了

吊 ！

i dunno why i did not reject

there is so many ways i can do to reject

but i did not

and i just let it be

why does this happened ?

i'm feeling that i'm searching so answer

searching something there

but i just couldn't describe it solidly

what i want to find out ?

what am i curious of ?

i had no idea

first time is like that

second time also like that

my life is a mess now

totally gone mess

awwwwwww

my limit expanded

or lets say

i had no limit at all now

OMG !!!

i'm waiting

one more weeks...

it will be december

my hearts

when are you feeling to come back ?

i'm waiting you

i'm giving a due now

by before my birthday

your return

will be a great present for myself

梦

继续让它去

即使

它

不会实现

但也没关系

起码

有个寄托

转换

一个视野

未必不好

sentimental

今夜特感性

那个梦

真的把沉睡的心

摇醒了

泪不停不停

的划过脸颊

累的夜

但，脑海特清醒

果然

没想像中好

太执着了

i'm just

someone

with

incomplete

heart

don't

come

near

me

cause

i

don't

wish

to

hurt

you

i

can't

give

you

return

can

you

give

up

on

me

?

seriously

i'm not ready

you

exist in wrong timing

天方夜谭

莫名其妙

莫名其妙

莫名其妙

疯了

怎么发这样的梦

真是天方夜谭

应该

要跳进泳池清醒清醒

@@

疯了疯了

句点

finally done the last things

everything is REALLY pull to an end

this time is REALLY an end d...

fiu ~~~

never thought that making you hating me is so easy

never thought that making you mad at me is so easy

good...

like that you only can set my soul free

cause i don't feel your love and misses anymore

then i can proudly walked off by saying

'this one, is not my destiny...cause his heart had no space for me'

i'm a stubborn woman ever

as long as i felt a slightly emotion of feeling of yours on me,

i will hold tight

so, making you hate me

and not keeping a slight of feeling

only i can completely let myself free

without regret

i'm now without regret saying that

"i'm leaving you"

burn all the memories

let the wind took the ashes

we leave the memories to sky

and only sky knew

once, there are a couple

so in love

so heartbreak

and lastly

they walked the opposite way

to find their

own destiny

面子

给我来说

只是个皮囊

我可以撕破脸皮

搞得难堪

如果

这个方法

可以得到我要得结果

我无所谓

i dun mind the process

result is my only concern

Oscar

残余的爱

剩下的余温

粉碎的记忆

破碎的情感

这样的一份感情，

不能要

要不得

已经

不完整

已经

不是当初

已经

不是初衷

making a story that is not true

and making you to believe

is really a hard task for me to do so

but is alright

i'm best oscar queen ever

at least the moment

you hate me

that is the result i want

which we both can move on

the last

再一次的

我

用狠毒的语言

伤害了

我的爱

因为

只有这样

他

会彻底，彻底

放下我

放下一切

不再欺骗自己

真诚的

往前走

这是

我最后

最后

能为你做的

this will be the last

i tear for you

my heart will close

my feeling will fade

everything

i left with the dust

張惠妹 - 還有眼淚就好 MV

is alright

as long as you still can shed a tear

means u tried before

means u loved before

means u hurt before

be strong and do not afraid to escape and runaway

support support o ~~~~

emo

being whole day staying at home resting

is not a good thing for me

the day without activities

the day without hassles

i think alot

i think bout my past

i think bout my present

i think bout my future

i'm afraid

i'm confused somehow

i can't see my future clearly

my mind is blank of it

i can't sense my present now

i don't know am i passing my day meaningfully or not

i can't let go my past so easily as i thought

i still remember every scene and every feeling of it

it still can give me a slight ache on the chest

i'm very tired today

but couldn't get a very well rest

as the brain keep spinning around the past present and future

how good

if i can just shut down

i hate miserable feelings

i hate miserable things

离开

有一天谈到这个话题

让我，深思了一下

如果有一天

突然的离去

我的葬礼

我希望是白色与紫色 色调

浪漫的

温柔的

气息

我的葬礼

要我很多很多

蒲公英

不里

我就是要

因为

它，象征自由，坚强

我的葬礼

要播着我喜爱的歌

carpenters - close to you

adele - one and only

air supply - making love out of nothing at all

eric clapton - wonderful tonight

还有很多，还没想到

我的葬礼

我允许我的亲爱们哭

你们就哭吧

可是不要太久哦

可以的话，聊聊我们以前做过的傻事

回忆我

怀念我

不要把我忘了

我害怕

被遗忘的感觉

真的，很怕

我的葬礼

我要我的亲爱们

穿的花枝招展， 化妆

要美美的

就像我们一起出街时那么的吸引

因为，最后的旅程

我都要美美的

而我

我要穿白色的连身裙， 长长的

如果，不幸的脸死得很丑

请盖上白布在我脸

不想到最后

让你们看到丑丑的我

我接收不到咯

我的葬礼

我要我的遗照

是笑的够力够力灿烂

如果我有拍到这样的照片的话

past tense

saw the photos

and the scene remind me of past

in the past

i always piggy back on his broad and strong body

and in the present now

the person now is not me anymore

i felt the sourish

but in the mean time

i felt sweet

as in...

i saw his smile

at least he is happy

complicated feeling in me now

nvm~~~

fall in love with this song again

"i love you like a love song"

it cheers me at least ~~~~

以前

曾经

已是往事

残留的

只有回忆

现在

未来

我期待

:)

Air Supply - Making Love Out Of Nothing At All (HQ Audio)(SOLID GOLD)

making love out of nothing at all ~~~

can a couple purely understand the meaning inside it ?

do you know the creation of making love ?

do you know why god created that way

this is the way when

we feel each other

so close

so near

just like two in one

without -you-

without -me-

is a -we-

is the way we feel intimacy

not for pleasure

yet not for leisure as well

is the purely way to feel each other

so deeply

that's call making love

and yet

couple nowadays

is called making sex

where do the love gone to ?

haih !

sigh

accidentally got drag into a little bit complicated situation

and i shall pull a stop on it

before it goes worst

hmm...

dislike this situation

why it is always so complicated to me

i'm should be the causes....

responsibilities lies on me....

i shall face the wall and think deeply

Selena Gomez & The Scene - Love You Like A Love Song

currently in love with this song...

cause...it reminds me of some scene

romantic yet like a bubble bubbling...

~short life~

that moment is kinda special

been long did not involve in that kind of life

and i felt young again

just like in uni life...

and i realize, the evil in my heart

starting to wake up

its been slept for one and half year

and is not gone yet, just hibernate

oh god ! i need my angel to control my devil

if not...i really how far it will bring me gone to

*pray hard

is a sin but i like it...

shit !!!

denial stage

再堕落

再犯贱

的日子

虽然很轻松

但

该是时候

醒醒了

疯也疯过了

颠也颠过了

犯贱也犯贱过了

是时候

把身分拉高了

come on

let me be a baby girl

at least for few moment

am too tired to be so rationally thinking

let me

let me

just let my emotion take over

do what ever i feel like doing

without thinking the consequences

without thinking the value

without thinking the worthy

just be irresponsible for at least now

i'm emotionally very tired

默读伤悲-林忆莲

给我一点时间

默读自己的伤悲

让自己清醒

让自己看清

不被自己相信所相信的

被蒙蔽

忘了真相

句号

那天你的突如其来，

就好像把我给催眠了

一个礼拜过了

我也该醒了

再一次的

你，abuse my trust to you, abuse my confident to you, abuse my love to you

三次

的给你机会

三次

的你无视它

那你别埋怨我，把一切责任堆积于我身上

为何放弃你

为何放开手

为何不信你

我，等你成熟

等得好累

我要休息

你不给我句号

没关系

就让我帮你画上吧

你没有的勇气

我帮你做

loving you is never tired

if you lend a hand for me

and together we fight for future

but now,

loving you is very tired and tortured for my heart

cause you keep your hand away from me

i can't hold any longer just keep hoping to see you show your hand to me

if helping you to get awake is a mistake

then i shall let you fall now

if fall that only can awake you

entire 3 months plus

you keep repeating the same mistake

you never learn from past

if this time you did not learn

i don't know how your future will be

you always said "past didn't represent future"

but for me, "your past determine your future"

do you understand what i mean ?

i can't worry you much anymore

cause i have my life to go own

i only sacrifice for the person that willing to fight future with me

i'm not strong

i'm not tough

i cry everyday and night

but sooner or later

i'll find back the smile in my face

not the fake one

but the sincere smile ever come deeply from my heart

:)

扭曲，丑陋

我的心

开始扭曲了

我的心

开始丑化了

不要招惹我

我控制不了我自己

因为，

我已开始失去理智了

我再也用不了理智来控制我自己了

我不想

把一切

搞的，不得安宁

我，不好惹

我，没你们想象的得好

我的心计

你不是没见识过

不要让我

再次

做出

彼此都会后悔的事

我也有我的极限

不要忘了我的曾经

如要放手

请放的彻底

如要抓紧

请不要轻易放手

加油好吗？

如果心里还有我

请抓紧我，不要放手

如果你还不定

请远离我

等你确定了

清楚了

才来作决定

我承受不住

一次又一次

心痛

在你眼里

我可以微笑

因为

我不要你因为我的伤痛

而影响你的决定

不要再伤害任何人了

我一个就够了

真的，不要招惹其她的了

你要学会，坚强

你要有定力

不要逃避了

好吗

我，帮不了你了

我有点累了

risk

the feeling of confuse came back to me

i just don't really know how the next step will be

i only know how to guide you to your next step

but i had forgotten how to plan my next step

what should i do now ?

i'm trembling and afraid at the moment i woke up this morning

and asking myself

was yesterday a dream ?

again - i see a dim hope

and again

i see fear came along

and again

i see the gambling table and the dealer is waiting my bet

bet my trust my heart

after all i'm just a little stupid gal

fragile - my heart calling

能够看见你的真心

让我

很感动

可惜

有点晚了

对吧

已经不如从前了

one and a half hour more

happy birthday to you ~~~

once again...i missed out the birthday celebration of yours

good thing you did not missed out mine ~~~~

really one and only time...hmmm

maid help or mess ???

the new maid is giving me trouble more than giving me help

hmmmppp cannot angry her cannot scold her

cause she is still NEW

she messed up my wardrobe until i can't find my clothes and worst to worst

she wash my clothes everyday which i don't wish to wash

it will spoilttttttttttttttttttt it keep on wash like dat....

pity my jeans

pity my shirts

ahhhhhhhh~~~~

going to jb soon

but the bad news is

i can't find driver to send me to astro company

i think i can bang wall d

people will ask

your house so many cars

no one can fetch u there meh ?

ya lo, my house so many cars

but everyone is busy

pathetic right ?

well, i get used to it

何去何从

slowly

i have move my life base back to klang, back to pj

i hang out with frens

i stay at home little more often

i think

i will miss cheras

been long did not travel there

i've been travel there up and down

for more than one and a half year plus

a place, a road which i always go

to find my love

and now

love gone

there is no point for me to go back there

it only recall all the memory

a memory that will give sourish to my heart

maybe one day, i'll pass by there again

when i'm ready

cause i really love there

not because of the environment

is because you are there

i can sense you

i can feel your existence

:(

sickness making me thinking of him even more...

miss his tenderness

miss his caring

miss his wanna angry but cannot angry face (cause he need to cancel his appointment with client just to take care me XD)

miss his cuteness (when i'm resting and sleeping in room...he will sneak in and out and look after me see whether i'm well a not)

hehehe...sweetness

hmm...now hafta drink fu cha (苦茶)

yucksssssss

ME !

have a crazy nite yesterday

and i realized something....

me is still me :)

i loved to play

i loved to crazy

i loved party

and one more thing....

hmmm....i don't felt guilt and i don't think of him

when i'm with another guy...

this is a good sign...

at least i prove it now....

i loved how i am now ~~~~

:)

不知怎的

我又梦见了你

但是，结局是好的

可是，我一点也没开心的感觉

也没一点期待的感觉

hilarious

sarcastic

or really just a simple care ?

well...

can't you just be little honest and straight forward to me ?

or you just wanna pretend to be a good person as you always want to present to others ?

or my message is not clear to you at the last call ???

if your concern is just to make yourself feel better...

then how bout me ???

have you ever know....

your simple weird simple message can actually still affect my entire mood ???

do you know i still care...?

i really wonder...

what are you thinking right now....

can you just be honest to your heart and tell me the truth ???

i'm tired of guessing and thinking...

if really really your concern towards me is just to make yourself feel better...

please save it up....cause it make me feel worst...

or you really want to be friend ... please stop it !

cause it is impossible...

don't let me hate you....

don't let me hate you...

don't let me hate you...

i don't want to~~~~~

原来

到现在

我家人

还想我做白领阶级

而不是

我的梦想

我的心

很痛

为什么

就不能

支持我的梦想

我累了

精神上

快疯了

I NEED A FUCKING GET AWAY FROM HERE !!!

~smoke~

思想在沉淀

行为在放荡-ing

不知道为什么

只知道 - 这样，感觉舒畅多 :)

人生偶尔，就要如此

-像个橡皮筋，偶尔拉紧偶尔放松-

现在，我的行为在放松者~~~~

无需责任

張惠妹 趁早

One and Only - Adele (Lyrics)

are u the one and only man in my life ???

can u be the one and only ???

i don't wan t more...but only one ???

will it be demanding ???

btw~i miss you...i dream of you this morning...

is a sweet one...but the ending is sad ending...

i cry in the dream...

and my pillow is wet...

离开后，别说祝我幸福，你有什么资格祝我幸福....

爱那么短

遗忘那么长

等待

是一生最初的苍老

有些事

一转身就是一辈子

蔡健雅 - 当你离开的时候

不要想不要想!!!

Christina Perri - Jar of Hearts Official Video

Adele - I Can't Make You Love Me (Live) Itunes Festival 2011 HD

i wish i could

楊丞琳-我們都傻 正式MV

期待会有奇迹出现。。。

嗯，还是不了

这样比较好。。。

李聖傑-你走了

现在的我

很努力的

摆脱这首歌

我应该

放过我自己

李圣杰 - 重来

你有如此的感受吗？

真希望，那天你是说

你想念我

而不是

你想念我们在一起的时光

陳奕迅 好久不見

思念

你的离开

点醒我了

原来生活上是会有遗憾的

没有完美的

这一路来

我的生活都很完整

都没失去过什么

都没什么大风波，大风浪

都是很顺很顺很顺

也很安逸很安逸很安逸

很想再叫你一次

kenken~

你做得很好噢

有遵守到承诺

不和我联络

不找我

不接我电话

真得很好

这样我才可以

不拖拖拉拉

完完全全

慢慢的把你放下

总在想

为何

我们

会走到

如此的结局

和我想象的终点

差好远好远噢

差好多好多噢

你可以给我一个完整的答案吗？？？

你还欠我一个真实的答案

好冤

曲终人散

告一段落了

只是事情，事件

现在

必须整理

内心的伤口

两个月的疗伤

慢慢有了起色

现在，在同个地方，又在被伤过一次

看来，有的治疗了

不知，要多久多久多久的时间

不知，又要泪崩到几时

我，又要重新的经历悲伤

亲爱的

你怎么那么的糊涂

还是你怎么那么的自私

没想清楚自己要的是什么

没理清楚自己的情感

就来挽留我

我回来了

你又怎样的对待我

你知道吗

我

慢慢的

感受着

爱的离去

感受着

你的冷漠对待

是有多么的残忍

我不是玩具

不是你得空的时候

找来陪伴过时间的玩具

不要怪我那么的想你

因为，你就是给到我如此的感觉

你表现出来的感觉

曲终人散

闭幕了

终于

闭幕了

没了期望

没了希望

对你

绝望了

致：逝去的爱

我不知道要怎么说
也不知道从何说起

只知道
该做的都做了
该努力的都努力
该付出的都付出了

现在是时候收回一切了

你，不爱我了
是个事实

你，糟蹋我了
也是个事实

所以，别怪我
连朋友都不想和你维持

也谢谢你
完全让我醒了
完全烧灭我对你的希望

痛还是会痛
因为我真的爱你多过于我爱自己

我没后悔过如此全心全意地爱你
是时候要没收一切情感一切爱了
因为你不值
因为你没资格

终于告一段落了
蒲公英要再次飘扬了

HoPe

hope everything will be good in time

hope everything will be good in time

hope everything will be good in time

all i need to do is patient

patient

patient

patient

anyway ~~~ dear readers....

GAMBATE !!!!

JIA YOU !!!!

do all our best of the best !!!!!!!

:)

无奈

你的爱

很孤独

你的爱

很寂寞

你的爱

很空无

你的爱

很飘渺

似有若无的爱

让我摸不着

到底

是有

还是

没有

啊，

爱情不能做比较

也许

你表达的爱就是如此

那如果是这样

我

尝试接受如此的爱

尝试享受如此的爱

真的真的

很害怕

我一路以来所感受到的

你，需要的是人的陪伴

而不是

终生伴侣

而不是

你爱的人

真不想

你其实把我当成

'fill in the blank'

女人

回家

迷路的小羊
终于回家了

这次它还会再走掉吗？
还是它真的回来了
不再想着出走？

我不想
围起栏杆
我不想
绑起绳索
我不想
限制你的一切

但我已失去信心与信任

你还会糟蹋
我给予你的自由吗？

你说
我只需信你 1%
其余的 99% 我们一起建立回

说真的
1% 我都很难给予你

但，我会加油
生命已无第二次机会
所以，人生在世
我都会给自己，给人家
第二次的机会
去努力
去争取
去证明

加油，加油
不要糟蹋了这个机会
因为，这次没了
就真的没了

Real @ dream

Should I
Or
Shouldn't I

I am confuse
I don't know how should I do

Is it for real ?

Hmm

Again
You make me out of my mind

I think I'm losing my mind d

I think I just follow the flow of the river ~~~

No matter what is the consequences that will come to me...

Support support
Friends pls support support

hmmm !

不对

是看错了

还是感觉错了

是错觉吗？？？

谁能给我答案 ？？？

the dream

i hate the dream

hopefully just like they said

is just a dream

but not an omen

FailuRe

till now
my heart still weak
my emotion still not stable

till now
I still thinking of him
I still feel his aroma around me

till now
I still feel pain when I wake up every morning

it's just like a big bang knock on head telling me
'YEs! the truth that he leave'
'YEs! you no longer can linger on him anymore'
'YEs! you have lost him'

I'm such a failure
that I could not overcome it
that I could not control my emotion
that I still can't let go myself

damm that my hand tremble again
please, peiling! don't fear of losing him
please stop tremble anymore...
your hand now is the most important asset in life





那天，与朋友谈到
情侣分手后还能做朋友吗
以前的我想不到答案
现在的我有答案了
-很难-
不是不可以
是很难
如果彼此的感情曾经很深
那要做回朋友很难
因为，情感很容易错乱
会理不清
真的很难
不是不要
不是不行
是真的很难

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

南柯一梦

南柯一梦属黄梁

堪叹人生不长久

有生有死皆有命

无贫无福亦无常

魂飞魄散归何处

性朗心空望故乡

渐对虚空伸召请

领沾经咒往西方

华人七月又到啦

是孝恩报亲节

就是，报答我们的祖先

我们已故的亲人

而不是什么鬼节啦

搞得恐怖兮兮的

平日不做亏心事

不怕夜里鬼敲门

但是

还是少出夜街

多多在家休息休息

为了更美好的明天

更美好的健康

英文8月咯

大家加油加油

新月份，新开始

心绪还是很乱

因为错过了一次机会

所以

怕了再次错过

没关系

再撑多几个月

就会没事了

有没有机会都算了

没关系了

~孩子~

有时候，

好希望自己还是个小孩

像个小孩般的

傻傻的

像个小孩般的

善忘的

那该多好

心爱的玩具没了

哭了一天

伤心了一天

睡一个觉

第二天起床

什么都忘了

忘了心爱的玩具昨天没了

或者是

妈妈买了个新的玩具

很快的，就爱上了新的玩意

将旧的抛之脑后

然后又快快乐乐的

过一天，又一天，再一天

完全忘了

以前最心爱的玩具

该有多好啊

简单简单的

怎么人越大

越那么难放下

为何就不能像个小孩一样

人的贪念很可怕

人的占有欲更可怕

我贪念你给我的快乐

我贪念你给我的温软

我贪念你给我的温柔

我贪念你给我的爱

所以

我想要拥有你

我想要占有你的心

我要你是完全的属于我

当然，你不是玩具

我不能如此的占据你

你有你的自由

你有你的选择

我还是尊重你

虽然心里是不平衡的

我还是会接受

就像你一样

会说服自己

让自己接受现实

勉强的，压着自己最真实的情感

when i was small

i used to have a smelly blanket

that i like to hold it tight and walk around with

is the most precious thing that i adore when i was small

one day, mom realized that i have grow up

and shouldn't behave like this

without consciously,

she threw my beloved blanket

i search for it like a mad kid all around the house

and keep asking my mom

where it is where it is

and realized

she threw it

i cried for long

and finally

i got fever for a week

cause my beloved are gone

mom got me a replaced one

but i dislike the new blanket

and still moaning of wanting to the old one

if,when i was this young

i used a week to cure my broken heart

then, the adult of me now

i wonder how long it will take to cure the broken heart

and is not bout losing THING that i loved so much

but is about a losing PERSON that i appreciate for long

this time i really in deep pain

really deep

serious shit !!!

peiling go go go

peiling go go go

jia you jia you jia you

stand tough stand tough

remember

一切皆空

没有任何的人，事，物

是永远的

是永久的

会来的

也会去的

会痛的

也会好得

就因为这样

人生才奇妙

人生才多姿

这一个的他

会让我更珍惜下一个的他

因为

我学到了宝贵的一堂课

我也尝到了

什么叫做真真的失去

流逝

时间的流逝

不同等于

疼痛的麻木

或是

疼痛的减少

多谢那个爱八卦的肥仔

又再一次的，挖我心中的伤口

噢，原来还在痛的

噢，原来我只是选择不理会它的存在

当自己没事了

猪八戒 - 就是你， 你要如何赎罪

你让我再次的意识到

痛从来没离开过我

你个猪八戒

我恨你啦 ！！！

不要逼我指名道姓 - 知趣的就乖乖来赎罪

多次想问候你

多次想找你

多次想与你聊天

但最后

都是制止了这个念头

因为理智来敲头说

时机未到

你的心

还未准备好

你还不够

坚强面对

现在

唯有等待

~ 秘密 ~

惊人的秘密

让我惊讶与心痛

天！

做么那么多的麻烦事

一个接一个来

亲爱的朋友们

你们要好好保重啊

别让我担心了

不，

应该说 - 别让我心痛了

最近姑奶奶的心脏不强

我会为你们祈祷

祈祷我们能够熬过一切煎熬

并且再从中成长与学习

加油加油！！！

我们就像这样

一起的努力

生活就是如此嘛

有波折

才会懂得

珍惜

才会懂得

保护

人生就好像云一样

变化多端

自能依据所看到的来猜测

他

在扮演什么

不同的人不同的角度

猜测不同的事物

而答案

自由云知道

true heart

busy life making me no time to think that much

till i almost forgot that is already one month

surprisingly~

this is a good sign

and i hope it continued to be like that

cause my life worth a better day everyday

hope you don't contact me anymore

serious shit not now

for me,

it couldn't be ready to be a friend of yours after what we have been through

time is needed for me to adjust the new status of us

and sometimes your action really makes me wonder

you really can treat me as a friend now ?

or you just pretend you can just like you always do ?

hmmmm no one knows, only yourself do...

如果你的关心

只是想让自己好过一点

那请你收回去吧

我需要的是真心对待

如此的关心

很虚伪

不要破坏了

我一直以来对你的感觉

~memories~

saw a couple playing "scissors, rock, paper" game at the long stairs of my dining place

and it recalled my sweet past memory

he and i used to play the game when take a walk at the garden...

winner can make a step forward while loser need to stand on the same point

he always loose to me...

sometimes i will wonder

is he really that stupid

or he purposely letting me win just to let me happy...

what ever it is...

it seems like to be a past for now...

is pain to see the truth that

the sweetness we used to be no longer there

i still miss the game we used to play

tho is stupid

but is fun

do you know that

i still kept the little memo you wrote to me

when i stayed over at your house during my study week about year ago ?

you wrote there telling me to take my breakfast

and where do you keep the house key for me to go out ?

i did not throw that pieces

i kept it always in my purse

and now,

it needed to be place in a box which i rarely will opened it

a box that i called memories~

legacybullshitting

legacy bull shitting is the place where
i can voice out my negative part in me

it just like a trash bin to me here
to throw all my negative emotion and opinion and thoughts

everyone does have the negative part in them
and why do we need to hide it ?

we need a place to store it...
yet
lets blog here...

dear readers you can all leave your bull shit comment on every post

don't mind the words

maybe some of my negative thoughts can inspired you in somehow

somehow it can motivate you even more to positive side
somehow it can trigger you to do something you always discourage to do so

be true to your own feelings and thinking
negative doesn't means bad
it might somehow lead you to think in the other way round
to seek for a better solution

so beware of all the negative ion i will spread on in this blog...
:)

from :
someone that you can't resist to hate and to love in the same time