blending mixing

there r so many things running in my mind now....
making me insomnia hmm

1st : i had a dream
is a scary dream
a dream which i can't hit my sales target
and actually is happening
aikssss
so, i can see how pressure and stress i am till, i can't utter to words from my mouth

2nd : fear approaches
my promise
my dream
it haunt me again...
and i need to face the fear of "if, i fail how"
cause i know
i cannot fail
i only can success
shit !

3rd : lovely kids
owh cute kids really make me wanna marry and get pregnant....
they are so pure and innocent and cute
i love them....
damm la !!! i'm still single weh...how to get marry and get pregnant
aih !


4th : commitment
36th years of marriage lifetime
it make me wonder
what is the core "thing" that can maintain this long relationship
and still so lovely
my father and my mother
they prove me that
actually fairy tale does happened
is just that it don't happened in kingdom
but it happened right in front of me
and prove that - love still around
they going through many of up and down
and yet...they still holding hand crossing finger tightly
never thinking of letting go
this love
which i can't see it in society nowadays
which this that making me losing faith on it
i hope i have the courage to truly love again

5th : hatred
my sis friend went to a camp
then is bout mentally innerly training....
what so ever
bla bla bla
she asked me a question
did you hate anybody by now ?
or example do you hate your ex
and my answer of course yes, but not my ex
is the bitch i hate
lolxxxxx ok i know is rude
and she said, is not good to hate...
cause it will stop you from growing
i know...
it will be part of my obstacle
one day i'll forgive her
now ? sorry i can't...

cocoon otw butterfly

-bad day-

there always up and down in life
and i feel that this is my down moment...
p/s : maybe not very down....but for me is quite down ady...

alot of thinking and feeling
i use to keep with myself
and keep it too well...
no body ever noticed
till ~~~ being misunderstand
p/s : is part of my fault, but why should i reveal all those emotion ?

well,
aquarius is a water
so
what happened to me now is...

i'm as a water
trying to fit into
a new bottles
a new shape
a new environment

i'm struggling to fit in
p/s : i'm very insecure actually, don't know what to afraid....is really don't know, and don't ask me why...i'm just insecure....i'm trying the best to overcome it...the problem is....i am the problem

i'm finding a way
a way of my way

i know i can make it...
hope it won't take too long to do so....
i'm not young anymore...i know it...
aikssss....shit

p/s : my hormone imbalance is really severe and terrible...it really affects me - innermost and outermost

不明白
为什么
要把小女人
硬生生的
训练成
大女人
-泪-

Answer that never get

L.O.V.E
or to be precise
R.E.L.A.T.I.O.N.S.H.I.P

this is a topic where every one will like to discuss
a never ending discussion

it will never had a confirm answer or formula for it
is always a blank left there to be fill in

but - none can judge

why is it not a formula like the maths 1+1=2

i need an answer
so that it won't went wrong in the middle or even at the starting
wouldn't it be easier for everyone
if there is a fix confirm answer and formula for it....

awww i dislike the feeling of waiting...
i only wait for food...
not a respond~~~

the voice

just hold on tight on what you believe

process is not a big matter after all

but the ending the result is the most of the concern

what you want

what you hope

that's the most vitality thought

principle is just a guideline to lead you to your path

is not a rules or padlock that block you away from getting your dream comes true

i'm doing what that gets me to my dream

unplanned process will lead me to a better memory and experience

so i won't mind what process i will encounter

cause

unexpected thing always surprise me

awake

finally awake d

贯彻

透彻

醒了

痛

i'm waiting

one more weeks...

it will be december

my hearts

when are you feeling to come back ?

i'm waiting you

i'm giving a due now

by before my birthday

your return

will be a great present for myself

梦

继续让它去

即使

它

不会实现

但也没关系

起码

有个寄托

转换

一个视野

未必不好

one and a half hour more

happy birthday to you ~~~

once again...i missed out the birthday celebration of yours

good thing you did not missed out mine ~~~~

really one and only time...hmmm

何去何从

slowly

i have move my life base back to klang, back to pj

i hang out with frens

i stay at home little more often

i think

i will miss cheras

been long did not travel there

i've been travel there up and down

for more than one and a half year plus

a place, a road which i always go

to find my love

and now

love gone

there is no point for me to go back there

it only recall all the memory

a memory that will give sourish to my heart

maybe one day, i'll pass by there again

when i'm ready

cause i really love there

not because of the environment

is because you are there

i can sense you

i can feel your existence

ME !

have a crazy nite yesterday

and i realized something....

me is still me :)

i loved to play

i loved to crazy

i loved party

and one more thing....

hmmm....i don't felt guilt and i don't think of him

when i'm with another guy...

this is a good sign...

at least i prove it now....

i loved how i am now ~~~~

:)

HoPe

hope everything will be good in time

hope everything will be good in time

hope everything will be good in time

all i need to do is patient

patient

patient

patient

anyway ~~~ dear readers....

GAMBATE !!!!

JIA YOU !!!!

do all our best of the best !!!!!!!

:)

回家

迷路的小羊
终于回家了

这次它还会再走掉吗？
还是它真的回来了
不再想着出走？

我不想
围起栏杆
我不想
绑起绳索
我不想
限制你的一切

但我已失去信心与信任

你还会糟蹋
我给予你的自由吗？

你说
我只需信你 1%
其余的 99% 我们一起建立回

说真的
1% 我都很难给予你

但，我会加油
生命已无第二次机会
所以，人生在世
我都会给自己，给人家
第二次的机会
去努力
去争取
去证明

加油，加油
不要糟蹋了这个机会
因为，这次没了
就真的没了

~ 秘密 ~

惊人的秘密

让我惊讶与心痛

天！

做么那么多的麻烦事

一个接一个来

亲爱的朋友们

你们要好好保重啊

别让我担心了

不，

应该说 - 别让我心痛了

最近姑奶奶的心脏不强

我会为你们祈祷

祈祷我们能够熬过一切煎熬

并且再从中成长与学习

加油加油！！！

我们就像这样

一起的努力

生活就是如此嘛

有波折

才会懂得

珍惜

才会懂得

保护

人生就好像云一样

变化多端

自能依据所看到的来猜测

他

在扮演什么

不同的人不同的角度

猜测不同的事物

而答案

自由云知道